Battle Scars

All I have ever wanted to do with my life was make music since I was 10 years old when I tried to write my first song. My brother laughed at me when he heard it and I stopped trying to write. The I heard Eminem and I caught the bug again. Now my brother is one of my biggest fans. I have been working to make my dreams come true ever since then. Now at the age of 25 I am still no closer to making that dream come true. In fact I feel further away with every year that passes. I have been kicked and beaten down so many times that I am used to being down more than up. I have an incredible support system that reminds me that I have to get up no matter what happens. It hurts to see someone dismiss your dreams in a split second like they mean absolutely nothing. Am I crazy? I am starting to have the creeping suspicion that I am. If I saw a life outside of music I would gladly take it, but so far I see none. I pray that God is just testing me and will show me a door soon because I am losing all my strength. All I want is to do what I love and share it with people. Otherwise I have no purpose in life.  And whats a life without purpose?

Chrystal Clear Thoughts

Last night I watched you sleeping, and I was overcome by this feeling/ It was so powerful and intriguing/ I felt my heart beating, thoughts peaking, fear creeping, fast breathing/ all reason, lost fleeting/ See at that moment I swear time stood still/ My mind became clearer than it’s ever been before/ Its like someone found the key to my minds hidden door/ It suddenly all made sense / Like the theory of relativity/ Or the discovery of fire/ It was my greatest moment/ I knew at that moment that compared to any other woman I have ever had in my life before/ I have never, ever, ever been in love like this for sure/ I don’t even know if love this deep is healthy, but it feels so good/ I am lying here realising that there is nothing I can’t stand about you/I get scared that you are not…

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Requiem for LOVE

Last night I watched you sleeping, and I was overcome by this feeling/ It was so powerful and intriguing/ I felt my heart beating, thoughts peaking, fear creeping, fast breathing/ all reason, lost fleeting/ See at that moment I swear time stood still/ My mind became clearer than it’s ever been before/ Its like someone found the key to my minds hidden door/ It suddenly all made sense / Like the theory of relativity/ Or the discovery of fire/ It was my greatest moment/ I knew at that moment that compared to any other woman I have ever had in my life before/ I have never, ever, ever been in love like this for sure/ I don’t even know if love this deep is healthy, but it feels so good/ I am lying here realising that there is nothing I can’t stand about you/I get scared that you are not real sometimes, but you are/ you exist, and I am so happy you share your existence on this earth with me/ Touching you is like hearing Gods voice/ Kissing you is like the sweetest melody ever played/ You are ten times better than anything I could have dreamed of/ You are perfect for me. Perfect for me. PERFECT FOR ME/When you look at me it’s like my entire soul is visible to you/ You make me weak and strong/ Invincible and fragile/ Wise and stupid/ I feel like licking you because I expect to taste caramel/ I could spend an entire day just telling you all the things I love about you/ I even breathe better when I am around you/ I am myself when I am around you/ But a better version of myself/ I love you with every single second that passes/ I love your mind, heart, smile, body, and spirit individually/You inspire parts of me I didn’t even know of/ So last night I watched you sleeping and came to this conclusion.  I love you/ I love loving you/ I love knowing that I am in love with you/ I love how much I am going to love you/ Forever, I LOVE YOU.